I guess we know now!

While we'll never know for sure, our doctor thinks Avery's latest troubles are linked to the Similac recall. Our last 2 Similac containers were involved in the recent recall, which just makes my stomach turn. Because of Avery's weight, we've kept her on formula, along with table food and whole milk, to make sure she is getting all of the nutrients and calories she needs each day. When she doesn't eat much, we try to catch her up in the evenings with formula. Of course, she will always take a bottle. While we've wanted to lose the bottle completely, she will no longer take a pacifier, and has since had her bottle replace it. We only give her the bottle when she feels bad or is very tired and fussy to calm her, but hope to be completely off soon. Any way, now that I have given excuses, lol, let me continue my story. Since she got her last shots and began having the loose stools, etc. per my last post, we began giving her more formula and bottles because that is all she would eat. Apparently, this made things worse, due to the issues with the formula causing "gastro-intestinal discomfort" as their website says. We had almost completely finished the 2nd container by the time this recall was publicized. While I feel the 1st container, which we purchased at Kroger, was not contaminated, I believe the 2nd container from Sam's was contaminated. Her problems began around the time we started that container. As we gave her less formula, she got better, and as she started feeling bad again, and we gave her more formula, her symptoms got worse. I couldn't find anything other that the gastro discomfort for things that can happen. Our nurse told us the problems should discontinue now that we're off the formula. While Avery has been better during the day, and her BMs are no longer loose and causing rash/burn on her bottom, she is still having problems sleeping at night.
I guess it has to be the night terrors again. She wakes up between 12:30 and 1:00 A.M. each night, screaming, non-stop, as if she is in pain or terrified of something. We are unable to wake her and unable to soothe her. It just makes me feel so helpless and when it continues on through the wee hours of the morning, it makes me feel like I am going crazy. When she did it early on as an infant, I read that while doctors do not believe children have them that young, there were other parents out there reporting the same symptoms with their babies who were the same age. Avery hasn't had them for some time now, but the last week, it has happened every night. The formula could have made her stomach hurt through the night and added to it, but I don't think that it is the sole reason for the way she is waking up and crying. It just stinks when you can't do anything to help her. I'm going to do some more research this weekend, and see what I can find out! We have decided to no longer give her formula, but to start her on PediaSure and Boost for extra calories. A friend also sent me some other things to try, while our speech therapist also gave us ways to increase calories in her meals. Next step- to finally separate her from the Ba-Ba for good!

I wish I knew....

Poor Avery, she is having loose stools again. She had them for almost a full week about a week and a half ago, and her little bottom was terrible with diaper burn. I assumed that she had the virus that has been going around. She had her 15 month shots on a Thursday, and the BMs started on Friday. She ran some fever, but that is normal for the shots. Since she was still fussy and doing it on Monday, I called and our sweet nurse told me to put her on clear liquids for 12 hours and bland diet for 12 hours. She also gave me a great cream recipe for my poor baby's bottom (see below). The cream helped, and Avery did a little better with the loose stools, but they really continued until Friday. Any way, she began having them again last night, and had several today, so I called back. They told me to pick up Lactinex, and take a stool sample for them to drop off in the morning. Oh my, this should be fun. My child HATES having her diaper changed, throws a fit even if she is just wet. Now, I am supposed to wrap her bottom in Saran Wrap as not to let the urine contaminate the BM. You should have seen the first time I tried that...I am sure you can picture it and make a good laugh out of it, go ahead, I really don't mind! So, first time was a charm, I wrapped her, and she had a BM shortly after. However, getting the Saran Wrap off of her, they way my child kicks and squirms when changing her diaper...let's just say, NOT EASY! I don't know if it is contaminated or not, so I am going to take a few to be sure. Seriously, she looks like she is doing a head stand when I change her diaper because she arches her back and twists and turns in such a way, she ends up on her head with me holding her feet up! She is going to be a gymnast I tell you!! I guess we will see in a few days if there is something going on when the lab results return. I worry about her doing that, because it is so important for her to gain weight and eat well. Other than that, Avery has begun to have these "night terrors" again. I say again, because she did this when she was about 3-4 months, and it is crazy. She just starts screaming in the middle of the night, and you cannot wake her up or soothe her. No bottle, no rocking, no walking, nothing helps. We try to wake her and talk to her (which I have read is not the answer, but what do you do between 1-3 a.m.??) She gets really worked up as she cries- so upsetting. She just screams until she finally wakes up or she just stops randomly. I just hate NOT knowing what is wrong, and NOT knowing how to make it better. There is no telling what goes through that poor baby's mind when she goes to sleep at night with some of the traumatic experiences she has had. Say a prayer for her if you will, thankfully, God takes care of us every time, and I know it will be better soon. I'm just trying to keep myself from worrying now.
Love,
Megan

God Listens

If you ever think God doesn't care about every little thing in your life and heart- think again. I used to think it silly to bother God with the little things, but as I've grown in my faith, he's revealed the opposite to be true. All of the little things can add up to something really big when we let them. The good thing is if God knows every hair on our head, and the inner most part of our being, he cares about all of those little things indeed. I've been sort of down lately...just feeling a bit overwhelmed with life in general, and overcome with anxiety about all sorts of things. For various reasons, this has been the case, but it is the case none the less. I realized the other night, that I hadn't been praying as much, and may be that was my biggest problem. I also thought about how, when I did pray, I'd strictly prayed for others and not myself. I then began to ask God to take on all of the things that were making my everyday life stressful, and to let me feel his strength, his comfort...that he would give me the kind of peace he has given me before, once again. Amazingly, God came through, as he always does. He is constant and true at all times, and he loves me...what an incredible hope to hold on to. I start to feel guilty because there are so many people I want to pray for and so many situations to remember...then there is my regular family and friend requests, etc. It can be hard to know how to pray and what to say at times. I'm still learning, but God is helping me. Since that point, even with little sleep as Avery has been sick, I have felt renewed in spirit. It's as if he is filtering the way things go through my mind as not to cause worry and anxiety. He's letting me know that "every little thing is gonna be alright" as Bob Marley said. It's funny how he gives you these feelings and thoughts to strengthen you, and he also makes things happen to let you know that he is there and in control. One thing I'd been worried about was this whole CHH thing...just wondering what to do, where to do it, how to do it, and if it would even make a difference. In a day's time, Kathy Means contacted me with the shirt design she'd been working on, and our hospital social worker called to tell me of the needs she would like us to help out with. Do you see how he can speak to you? He was telling me that this was something he set out for me to do, and that it did matter, that I matter. I just feel revitalized now. Even if one person feels prayed for and special through this process, and especially if one person is able to feel the connection to God that I am able to feel, it will be totally worthwhile!
By the way, please see the CHH blog for new posts, as well as the new t-shirt design and Sharpie donation drive for Batson!
Love,
Meg